It has arrived, the baby to beat all babies. Asa Akira the greatest Japanese American adult film star has just given birth to her baby. It’s been a long journey for Asa who had many questions and doubts. But today, after nine long months, the Jeremy Lin of adult film stars revealed on Twitter that she busted a baby out. In the tweet, she remained her funny self and tweeted how unbeautiful labor is and being the constant worker that she is, was already thinking about how to get into shape.
Just gave birth! 2 things: 1) I was told labor is beautiful, this is untrue. 2) Is anyone currently infected with a stomach virus willing to come shit in my mouth so I can kick start this post partum diet? Will consider parasites and worms as well. Thx! Serious inquiries only.
— Asa Akira (@AsaAkira) February 13, 2019
It’s been a long journey for Asa Akira and her newborn baby. When she first announced her pregnancy there were only three outcomes. One was an abortion, two was the cousin of abortion which is a miscarriage, and the third was going all the way and giving birth. If you were a betting man like I am, the odds of Asa getting an abortion was pretty good as she has two prior abortions. This was a lock pick, the Golden Warriors pick. The miscarriage was a coin flip which leaves Asa giving birth an underdog pick. And I mean a real true underdog pick like if you picked Tomi Lahren to beat Cardi B in a street fight. It was like putting $100 and getting a payout of $100000000000.
But this miracle baby beat all the odds and possible Plan B pills and made it a whole nine months in Asa Akira. Like mother like baby he or she soldiered on. And now this baby, born on February 13, 2019, a day before Valentine’s Day, will be taken care of by Asa and Sean Maroney, who is her baby daddy and husband. This is their first baby for both parents. Asa hasn’t clarified the sex of the baby but she did post a real picture of her giving birth which can be seen below.
I’m kidding and in all seriousness congratulations to Asa Akira and her new baby. Although she’s an adult film star and with that comes some negative perceptions, I, however, think Asa will be an awesome mom because she’s an awesome adult actor. If you’ve seen her stuff you know she doesn’t half-ass anything so why would she half-ass motherhood. And if she’s not then she can just dump it on the sidewalk or something.